Juli and Words Related To

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This weekend, we saw a funny social media post about what your name means in the Urban Dictionary. I forget how lulz the UD is, it’s like an entire site of folks who couldn’t quite cut it at the Onion but is fine for the rest of us.

We started with Matt because I had seen a few funny definitions on the article about the names but when we looked, it started with “eternal sex-god.” Heh. Another one throws in that a Matt will make you feel like a princess when he’s with you (that actually has never happened) but when he’s not with you, you’ll know he’s making ANOTHER girl feel like a princess (also has never happened;)

I lolzed at the “a guy who will grab his female’s best friend’s ass because he knows he can get away with it.” I don’t even know who Matt’s female best friend is but I’m hoping she actually would NOT let him grab her ass.

From there, we went to my name. Now, originally, my name was spelled    J-U-L-I-E but when I was in elementary school, there were about 9 Julie’s and my 3rd grade teacher started giving us distinction’s. I was Julie-I and at some point in junior high I just dropped the ‘e.’ I had it made legal when I got divorced since our divorce was pretty low maintenance and it was easy to do the change (we shared the lawyer and got off pretty easy. I had a friend who got divorced about a year later and when she said it was costing her north of 50 grand so far I nearly fainted. 50 grand. To lawyers. Fuck that.)

Anyways. I’ve been Juli (no e) ever since. In 2003 my biological brother and I located our Hawaiian family, still living on Maui and the door was opened to our past. It seems my birth name was Carol Sue U’ilani Knapp. (You don’t need to google it, our birth mother told our Tutu that we were killed in a car crash in Victoria when the great state of Texas decided to take us away from her and adopt us out to three different families instead of, oh I dunno, fucking help her?!) I’ve read the news clipping of Carol Sue’s death, mind fuck times a billion.

However; ironically enough,  Julie/Juli and U’ilani have similarities in their actual meaning and I won’t lie, it’s comforting that even among two families who never knew each other, the universe took care of making sure there was a connection. Back in the day when I worked with the Texas crew, Rip would call U’ilani my “outer space name” (my Auntie gave me a beautiful Hawaiian pendent with my name on it that I wear proudly.) Shrug, some people don’t understand adoption. Not my problem.

The real Hawaiian meaning of U’ilani is Heavenly Beauty. (I do okay but I think that’s a bit overstated.) Really. The first UD definition of Juli is “the personification of beauty.” heeeeheee. Really, I look at the few pictures I have of my birth mother and then look at pictures of my daughter, yep, skipped a generation! Lulz. (No, I don’t want to hear ‘ooooo but u so purty.’) I’m fine. I do okay. My mother also had thick ankles, see how I’m okay she didn’t pass EVERYTHING on to me!

The fun of the Urban Dictionary meanings; however; comes in the section of “words related to…” section. Example, words related to Matt:

Gay*Sex*Amazing*Dick*Cool*Fuck

A couple of those are my most favorite words on the planet. True story.

Words related to Juli:

Funny*Beautiful*Bitch*Love

Ya, I’ll own those. Heh.

We started looked around at more ‘words related to’ some of our friend’s names…

Yvonne: And Sex Hole (uhhhhWhut?)

Jason: Fag (I’ll be completely honest here, I miss the word ‘fag.’ In the 70’s we could say basically any word that had the meaning of ‘dork’ and people understood that then. No more.)

Jasmine: Sexy*Pretty*Cool (you go girl.)

Mark: Hickey (I’m checking Victoria’s neck next time I see her!)

Amber: An exceptionally attractive pale young woman with beautiful freckles and a divine rack. (yes, I know it’s the full definition but it defines my Amber bestie to a T! So much so that I wonder if her hubby was the one who entered it. heeeee)

So social media has it’s place for fun. I guess. If you have an extra minute, check out your name instead of watching 4 minutes of crappy lifting videos on the Facebook. It’ll be worth your time.

Says Juli…cuz, ya know, Aphrodite was also known as Juli.

Lullllllllllllz!

What difference does it make to the dead, the orphans, and the homeless, whether the mad destruction is wrought under the name of totalitarianism or the holy name of liberty or democracy?

Mahatma Gandhi

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Hey, You! Get Off of My Cloud!

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I can’t. I just can’t. I can’t take it anymore. The whining; the attention whoring; the wasting of hours and hours of a lifetime, I just can’t. Some how in the last eight or so years, Mark Zuckerberg has talked us into the idea that we need his app. That we cannot wait in a grocery line without checking his app. That we cannot sit at a dinner or a hockey game together without checking his app.

That his app takes more priority than connecting with the real people or the real situations in front of us. I just can’t.

I don’t know what the final straw was. Perhaps the constant political rhetoric that benefits your point of view; people living their lives according to meme’s; the attention whoring selfies of girls who sit in the gyms with their cameras ready to go, lips pouting, ass sticking out, barely clothed. Ya know what sluts? I don’t care how much you lift. At all. Put some fucking clothes on and just train. I enjoy training videos of friends kicking total ass in the gym and celebrating their hard work. If that’s ALL that were on the Facebook, I’m game.

If ALL posts on the Facebook were positive, people celebrating each other; cute baby photo’s and videos of panda bears playing I’m on board. If ALL posts were like my PNW friend’s Big Daddy and his wife, Devil Ang telling each other how thankful they are for each other (plus Big Daddy’s training videos) I’m there. If ALL we could see on the Facebook were real I’m all for it.

But it’s not, or at least, the majority of it isn’t. It’s mean spirited; keyboard warriors hiding behind socially accepted cyber bullying who’s motto is “IF YOU’RE NOT FOR US, YOU’RE AGAINST US AND NOW WE’RE COMING AFTER YOU!” Hey, remember the time it wasn’t okay to go through life like that? I do. Most adults in their early 20’s don’t. We’ve done that. We’ve shown young adults that they’re too young to be adults and to live entitled and offended at every turn of life.

We’ve taught them that standards are bad. That respectful debate has no part in having an opinion. You disagree with me? Bring on the meme’s. You can say that gay marriage is good but I can’t say gay marriage is bad. My opinion makes me a homophobe. No, I don’t believe gay marriage is the ruination of America, but I DO believe that the Gay Lobby is nearly as powerful as the Pharm Lobby and has ruined good people in it’s wake, just as the Christian Right Lobby has. Newsflash people, your methods are the same. You’re just too caught up in argument to know it. Send out a meme to make your point.

I can’t.

I can’t read about people with really good lives bitch about them. I can’t read about people with a lot of talent put themselves down. I can’t read about unhealthy people not feeling well but refusing to get strong and change their food.

Enough. I’m out…peace YO!

So imagine my surprise last night when Matt said that I had a message from a friend on my FB page? Ummmm, no, I deactivated it. He says, no it’s there. Ummmmm, whut? So I guess even when you try to get out, the Facebook crew decides they don’t like it and reactivate your account.

Sit on that a bit people. You’re okay with that? I’m not okay with that. So I deactivated again, we’ll see how long that sticks.

I have a phone. I have an e-mail. My home even accepts US Mail so go ahead and send me a letter, I love letters! If people in my life think I’m unreachable because I’ve signed off the FB, then you’re in deeper than you thought. OH! I even have an Instagram and Oooooooo, the attention whoring is x1000 on the Instagram. The difference is that the negativity is held to a minimum, in fact, it’s pretty damn rare. And I like that. I can block the stupid girls who troll the internet for dates with their pictures and even the valid training systems who only use scantily clad andro babes as their marketing tools. Whatev dudes.

But the Facebook? Fuck off. I’ve let you steal hours of my life and watch you do the same to my loved ones. There are many times where I view the Facebook as “the other woman.” Think I’m exaggerating? Watch how many times a day your partners/children/co-workers faces are shoved into their phones.

So. Fucking. Done.

I like the idea of isolation, I like the idea of solitude. You can be connected and have a phone and still be lonely.

Paul Theroux

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Reps For Dayz

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Gratuitous picture of Lidia Valentin

I had a nice birds eye view last weekend in the warm-up room before I lifted. We had 13 girls (lucky 13 on Friday the 13th;) lift and three of us were opening in the Snatch after the other lifters were almost complete with all three of their attempts. That means that there was a lot of downtime for me while others were warming up.

Now, I remember last year at my local meet when I noticed one woman in my group who started warming up a half and hour before our session was to begin and her opener was a couple of kilos under mine. Uhhhhhhh, dudette, we won’t be taking our first attempt until around 10:30…whaz up?

At that meet, I got on the Airdyne around 15 minutes before our session was to start. From there, I didn’t touch a bar for another 25 minutes. My warm ups take about 7 minutes and from there I take about four lifts before my opener. Now (hopefully) this may change as I increase my lifts. I may throw one more light one in there. Time will tell.

But just as in Milwaukee, the amount of reps taken by most lifters in Savannah shocked me. Now, there were a few lifters who were very deliberate in their warm-ups. One woman in my class who has just finished cancer treatment (yeah, have I said yet how amazing these women were?) was lifting very conservatively and was coached by Michael Cohen (lucky girl.) They were across the gym from my platform and he had tight control of her warm-ups while remaining very positive and supportive (again, lucky girl.)

Another girl was lifting without a coach and while I didn’t see what she was doing the whole time, she seemed to have her reps put in place. At the very least, she wasn’t pulling every time I looked over.

But OyVey, some of the women took more reps in their warm up than I even take in a training session. One woman next to me worked up to just one kilo less than her 1st attempt and came right back to the platform to take reps in between her attempts.

Now, yes, I understand that it’s necessary at times to take a rep in between attempts. I saw Michael Cohen do it earlier in the day during his session. However; as most of us lifters (seems coaches haven’t realized this yet) know, that rep is taken at a much lighter weight and we know we have at least “x” minutes before our next attempt. We’re not going to go back to the warm up area and start lifting higher than our first attempt when our second is going to be in about 90 seconds. Yes, I’m serious.

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Melanie Roach always looks so happy when she lifts!

The woman on my platform took reps in between her attempts and by the end of the session, she looked like she’d been through a war. Congratulations, you’ve just lifted the equivalent of three weightlifting meets, how the fuck are ya?! As nice as both she and her coach were, I wanted to scream SIT DOWN FOR GAWDS SAKES! 

After we were done and Matt and I were driving to dinner (The Crab Shack on Tybee Island was the place Michael Cohen sent us and he was spot on. It was fun and delicious and perfect.) Anyways. I told Matt about how many reps the ladies were taking in the back and he said, ‘It showed. People were tired.’ I imagine they were.

And since I’m bagging on coaches a little bit…

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I adore watching Jim Harbaugh lose his shit on a regular basis but no way would I want to be coached by him.

…let’s talk about intense coaches.

In general, I’m a pretty calm coach. Sure, I’ll get stern and may bark a bit if the weight is heavy enough and the cue is important enough that I need to ensure my lifter hears my voice but I approach competition as relaxed as I can. Throwing has helped me with that. The tighter and more intense I feel, the crappier (it’s totally a word) I throw. So I relax, the power is there and it will be drawn upon when needed. I can get myself fired up without the band aids of music or pacing or being a cunty bitch to others. It’s how I roll. It’s funny to me when people in the throwing world tell me I’m so intense (like it’s a bad thing?) How I interpret that is that I give a shit on how I throw so I may not join in their reindeer games along the sidelines and that’s seen as a bad thing. *Shrug*

So when I see coaches in a warm up area pacing back and forth so tense it seems their heads are going to pop off at any second, I stay far away from them. I want no part of that energy, it sucks the life out of a room. I’d rather be uncoached for the rest of my days than put up with something like that. This is a meet, the ground work has been laid, it’s go time. I’ll watch the monitor/table for you and tell you calmly when you need to take a rep. I won’t stalk over to you like Big Deloris and tersely say, “NOW, go NOW.” JHMFC dude, sit down and have a sammich, you’re wound tighter than the lifter who already is looking nervous.

So here’s my observation; warming up at a meet is approached the same was as training in a commercial gym, head down and focused on your own shit. I was pleased I got to meet some very nice ladies and even give some ‘atta girls’ when they did well and they did the same for me. That’s cool and not very common in my experience of weightlifting. I stayed relaxed, kept my warm ups to the minimum and went 6 for 6 for the first time in a meet.

But I only took 5 snatch warm ups before my first attempt and three of those were very light. I took five warm-ups for my C&J opener of 75kg and two of those were 45kg. That’s 16 lifts overall on the day and my body was extremely tired the next day. I have no clue how the women who took about 40 attempts (think I’m exaggerating?) felt. Uff.

Ask any athlete: We all hurt at times. I’m asking my body to go through 7 different tasks. To ask it not to ache would be too much.

Jackie Joyner-Kersey

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80 to 20 and Everything In Between

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As some of you may know, I competed at the Masters American Weightlifting Championships last weekend in Savannah, Georgia. We flew out Wednesday morning in order to hit town and attend the technical meeting on Wednesday night.

Now, I realize that many weren’t at the meeting and perhaps it’s silly to go in early for it; however; this was my first National level weightlifting meet and I wanted to make sure I knew what was going on from the get go.

Walking into the Cohen-Anderson Weightlifting Center was like stepping back in time. This was a true training hall. Olympians train here (actually, Olympian’s run it.) The old York plates,

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 give a feeling of the history of the lifters in this gym. At one point, after Howard Cohen was going through some introductions and we were waiting for the final schedule, I looked at Matt and said, “I don’t know if I’m prepared to lift here.” This was special. These people are special and hold a solid place in the history of Weightlifting. Blame the Hawaiian in me, when I attend such things, I want to bring honor to them.

Nonetheless, I was there and I was there to lift my best on that day. As it turns out, our session WAS moved up so I was very happy I was there to have a handle on that. After the meeting, we headed out for some great southern cooking at Sweet Potatoes and back to the hotel for some rest.

Thursday was a day we had half planned and decided to wing the other half. I really wanted to watch the first session of women lift and lucky for me, Matt was game so he came with me where the concession stand ladies (Howard Cohen’s wife among them) took it as their personal mission to ensure that he had enough food. Heh.

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Have you ever seen an 80 year old woman Snatch and Clean&Jerk? No? I have! All of the women brought such great energy and tenacity to each lift, I have rarely been so inspired in all my life. I was able to talk briefly to a few of the lifters and I hope to never forget these conversations. One lifter, whom we spoke to back at the hotel, is a little over a year out from a double knee replacement and though her lifts aren’t where she wants them to be, she put a huge smile on her face and said, But at least I can lift! Just typing that gave me chicken skin. When you find people who are so thankful for lifting, you’ve found role models.

Another lifter, Jane Black, out of Coffee’s gym showed such energy and spirit in her lifts. Her congratulations to me the next day and the fist bumps from she and her lifter meant the world to me. Class, personified. I adored these women.

When we were done at the meet, we headed downtown for lunch and found the Pirate’s House. A fried green tomato BLT was my splurge up until that point and let me tell you, as good as it was, I felt as if I’d just ate about 12 pounds of food. I’m pretty sure the earth shook with each step. I was about two degrees south of outright misery. We walked along the River and enjoyed the sunny day and after a while I just wanted to go lay down.

Now, early last spring in the throwing season, I did the same thing in Hawaii. I enjoyed enough beach time, relaxing patio time, and Mai Tai’s that by the time I was walking up to the throwing field I thought to myself, uh-oh; I am in no way prepared for a physical outing here. I was too relaxed. Too bogged down by drinks and sun I was in no way ready to throw out in the heat all day.

That is exactly how I felt walking towards the ancient stairs to head back up to the car. Bogged down. Slow. Heavy. As we started up the stairs, I stopped; looked up, and headed right back down. Matt turned around and asked if everything was okay. I say,”Yup, but I’m going to run those stairs.” And I did. Seven times. The stairs were hidden enough that I could do this without being a glaring attention whore and yet get this necessary work in.

And it worked. In fact, I had told myself I was going to do five rounds. But after number 5 I still felt heavy, so I went to 8 in my mind. After 7 I got to the top, looked at Matt and said, “I’m good.” At some point when I was still flying around Matt said, ‘when people ask me how my wife kicks ass I’ll just tell them because when we’re on vacation and she doesn’t feel ready for competition, she runs stairs.’ I thought that was sweet.

Now I was ready. I felt much better. I made sure those twenty steps (not very many really) were springy and explosive and I wouldn’t quit until the last one. A little later we headed back to Sweet Potatoes Kitchen for pre-meet dinner. The dinners were exactly what was needed. Meat and Potatoes that weren’t heavy.

Now I was ready.

I had a decent meet, I hit my conservative openers and that was the goal. I’m now qualified to register for some high level Master’s meets in 2016 and that’s why we went.

And now it’s time to get to work. I feel very fortunate that I have Mike Westerling’s help with programming of the lifts and throwing. I’m already training smarter, even in a deload week. Thanks to my friend, Paulie, out in Brooklyn who hooked me up with the Renaissance Periodization diet I can begin to get rid of the extra 30 pounds I’m carrying.

I’m not nearly as tired as I was a week ago and I’m feeling far more optimistic about this off-season than I have been the last month. I have some pretty lofty goals for 2016 but I feel confident that with the help I’m getting; hard work, and a few lucky bounces that these goals are realistic.

Time will tell. In the meantime, I’ll remember these ladies and the fact that there are 80 year old’s records that I hope to someday shoot for and the fact that staying strong and active is a gift.

When it’s obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don’t adjust the goals, adjust the action steps.

Confucius 

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