I recall the years I spent as a young girl (all great novels OR blog posts start out this way) that I held my breath on February 2nd to hear if a groundhog saw his shadow and whether or not this Hawaiian growing up in frigid Minnesota would have to deal with another 6 weeks of winter.

If memory serves correctly, Minnesota winters were brutal. I actually KNOW that memory serves correctly because the coldest I’ve been each and every winter since I’ve moved away is when I come back for a visit. Windchill’s that register in the negative 30s or 40s? Pshhhh, you’re still walking to school kid, bundle up. Layers of ice that have shut down Texas? Better leave more time to get to where you’re going. Walk to work in 18 inches of new snow because the busses can’t run? Yup. A Minnesota winter is not for the weak.

Any chance I had to cut this torture short by 6 weeks was welcomed and all I had to do was watch tv in the morning with Pastor John and wait for Puxawhatever Phil to see his shadow (or don’t. I still have no idea how this bullshit is measured.) I vividly remember the conversation in my late elementary years with my mom during a March boy’s hockey tournament snowstorm (if it doesn’t snowstorm during the boy’s hockey tournament in Minnesota, look out. It means it’s coming later and it’ll be a doosie) that we weren’t supposed to have any more winter cuz, ya know, groundhog day and all. Well, Lynda looked at me like I was either stupid or crazy and laid the truth bomb on me that Groundhog’s day didn’t REALLY mean anything other than February 2nd was probably pretty miserable in the northern regions of the country and needed a distraction.

What!The!Actual!Fuck! There ya go, as if 11 didn’t suck enough for me. Now I knew that no matter what, February 2nd was the day that GUARANTEED at least 6 weeks more of winter and became one of the more hated of dates on the calendar. What a rip.

And so began my distrust of anything and everything that appeared differently than what I was told. The fancy term for it now is ‘gaslighting’ but it all rolls back to the February 2nd’s of my childhood.

In later years, as a mother myself, I used the pomp and circumstance of Feb 2 to show my children that the TV will lie to you. There is no “maybe” in another 6 weeks of a Minnesota winter, only an absolute “yasure deal with it, get your snow pants on for the drive to school.” (One year the school district recommended that those children who are being driven to school NOT wear their snow pants to streamline the process of getting everything off and hung up in the hallways when school started which meant that the children who’s parents were dumb enough to follow this rule stood outside in below zero temps while waiting for the school doors to open without snow pants and oops, maybe this wasn’t smart.) By the way, I never got a “thanks mom for your honesty” for that one. Ingrates.

Enjoy your Feb 2nd. The good news is that Austin, TX will be back up in the 70’s in a few days. Texas has a sort of reverse Groundhog day where they get around 6 days of winter in February. Cool. Another reason to love Texas. But if you’re up north, suck it up folks, winter is here to stay for at least another 6 weeks. The rodent lies. Truth.

Ok, campers, rise and shine, and don’t forget your booties because it’s cold out there. It’s cold out there every day.