I’m noticing a (new?) trend. The word “Wow’ has taken over where “Whatever’ left off. Whatever became so popular, it would be impossible to be out and aboot without hearing it at least twice from neighboring tables.
The meaning, however, was far more important than the word. If you “whatever’d” someone, it could be that you’re saying ‘F*ck you’, ‘You’re lying’, ‘You’re silly’, or it could simply be your end to an inane argument. The thing with ‘Whatever’ though, is you could use it in fun and flirty ways. Come on, who here hasn’t batted their eyelashes, kicked out a whatever with a little shoulder push and enjoyed a little teasing? And that’s where ‘Wow’ has split ways with it’s kinder counterpart.
Wow is used simply as “F*ck you, you’re crazy.” That’s it. You can widen your eyes, you can shake your head, you can use your hands to accent the slam, but when you use ‘Wow’, you win. It’s an instant ender to conversation. You don’t have to be eloquent or creative enough to form thoughts into sentences, you can just say “Woowwwww” and it’s done. It’s rudeness and passive aggressiveness at it’s finest.
Tonight is the last Presidential debate. Points go to whomever says ‘Wow’ while shaking their head and getting really wide eyed more times than the other guy. Us? We’ll be watching the Bears stomp the Lions while checking on the Giants score so we’re pretty busy.
Here’s a little WOW (using the word the old fashioned way) from the countrysides of Somewhere, Wisconsin we drove by this weekend…