Check any assisted living or nursing home pantry and they’ll have cases of this crap. 9g Protein? How about two eggs? That’s 14. 

Also, Ensure has 34g of Carbohydrates and 9g of fat. The first ingredients of Ensure are:

Corn Syrup; Corn Maltodextrin; Sugar (Sucrose); Corn Oil. Read: TOTAL SHIT. It pisses me off that it’s passed off to the elderly and adolescents, two groups of the population who need better in order to thrive.

But that’s actually not the point of today. I know, getting sidetracked is common around here. Starting off sidetracked may be a first. Anyways.

I had a conversation the other day with someone I love very much. This person’s DNA hates them. Heart disease and Diabetes run rampant among family members and I used my stern mommy voice when I said, “You have to do better.” The response I got, real and honest, was I know, I’m not eating as much chocolate as I like to.

This is the crux of having people you love follow traditional nutrition. So many look at what they’re NOT doing with absolute disregard with what they ARE doing. And what you ARE doing, is driving yourself into the ground. Oh sure, doctors and a handy marketing department will tell you that one ensure shake a day is what it takes to undo everything wrong. Fok.

It’s overwhelming. It’s daunting. How do you get through? Tough love? Repetition and repetition? Gently (clearly not my strongsuit)? The fact is: the “healthcare” field has passively aggressively been placing Americans into an early state of decrepitude for a very long time. Probably since industrialized times but I’ll let people smarter than me write about that. They’re quick to prescribe and slow to be stern about lifestyle. People want welfare recipients to be drug tested yet are some of the first to go to the doctor for drugs when they don’t feel perfect (but that’s okay because they’re insured and are prescribed by doctors.)  Fok that.

I care about now. I care about so many people who do not take their health seriously. People of all ages. Sure, it’s tough to tell youngins how important good sleep and nutrition are. They’re invincible. Or are they? My Facebook feed is full of complaints from the 20-somethings. They feel like crap (look like crap too but I guess I’m insensitive when I say that to their face.) They don’t sleep well. They’re stressed (it’s adulthood kids, it doesn’t go away until you do.) Medications are S.O.P and doctor’s appointments are like going out for Taco’s (both probably happen too often.) They treat their bodies like a Destroilet and then take to social media to bitch about how crappy they feel.

OH hold on, you don’t know what a Destroilet is?

A Destoilet is a throne you T.T. and shit upon and when you close the lid, a fire incinerates said shit. We had one at the Cabin. Briefly. It was the most terrifying experience of my childhood and I preferred to take my chances with the spiders and bats heading out to the Outhouse. Both options were horrible and as soon as I was able (about 11 years old), I’d just take the mini-bike and trek the 2 miles to Patterson’s to use their bathroom. Fuck that noise (literally, the noise from the Destroilet was like a raging inferno coming for your shit. )

Anyways. But this is what many young people I know are doing to themselves. DOING. See, that’s what is important. Not what you’re NOT DOING. Your food choices cause inflammation. Your dependence on Medications to make you feel better (even though you’re feeling like shit because of the side effects) instead of going to the gym and lifting weights; or Zumba; or Water Aerobics, or anything goddsakes ensures (see what I did there?) that you stay diseased. They put all this shit IN their bodies and believe it will all just be burned out at some point (it isn’t. That’s why you feel like shit.)

But I’m not going to just pick on the young people here. We do it too. It’s all over the place. I hear it at least once a week from someone. I want “X” and I don’t do “Y” as much anymore so I should be feeling better or looking better. My answer? Well, because your “A-W plus Z” is complete shit. Why would you expect different results?

You don’t take 8 hours of sleep seriously (yes, 8. Generally. 6 doesn’t cut it and if you need 10 or more you need to go get a sleep study done cuz you’re not sleeping efficiently). There’s something you’re NOT doing. You don’t take nutrition seriously (not eating breakfast; a “nutrition bar” for lunch and then constant snacking on crap for the rest of the day and night isn’t nutrition. It’s a one way ticket to disease. Have a nice trip.) There’s another thing you’re NOT doing. You’re not getting to the gym to lift some weights. Yes, walking is good. On that note:

I was throwing yesterday at my normal place (by normal, I mean I have lines sprayed in the grass in a certain spot so I never have to reset my shit at a large park. It’s a bit beat up right now but I’m too lazy to move and remeasure) when an elderly gentlemen walked up and said he’s seen me here a lot and what am I doing. We talked a bit and I gave him an atta boy for getting out in the heat and moving. He gave me a rundown of his routes and I told him he moves very well, if he didn’t mind my saying. He went on to say he lifts weights at Planet Fitness four times a week for 15 minutes also and at 77, he feels good about doing all of this. He said that so many of his friends that just walk have knee and hip pain and he tries to get them to put some muscle on but they think the added weight would be bad. So he just let’s them be and listens to them complain. (He also said he makes sure he eats a lot of protein each day. I didn’t ask what that looks like, I didn’t need to;) I told him I was proud of him and to keep up the great work and I hear his frustration. It was an awesome little encounter.

This guy gets it. This guy is DOING everything he can to stay fit; keep muscle on, and thrive in his 70’s. At least that’s my impression after a brief discussion. None of this, “Go gently into that good night” bullshit. He’s raging. He’s DOING. He’s thriving.

Does it guarantee health? Nope. Not at all. But it does give you more of a fighting chance in states of unhealth. It gives you a chance to have good days. To be better emotionally balanced. To feel good about the choices you make. It helps you look in the mirror and Stuart Smalley that shit.

But you can’t skip steps. There is a flow chart for health and it’s actually very simple. But not easy. I actually understand that. As important as it is to me, I fail on a weekly basis. The difference is my fail’s are small and do not derail. I can absorb them and when I string together enough fail’s that I start feeling ucky (totes a word) I take inventory. I run them by the hubs and he helps me get back on track. He’s supes awesome that way.

Focus on what you’re DOING. Your answers to your state of health, or unhealth, are right there.

I’ve just had eighteen straight whiskies. I think that’s the record.

Dylan Thomas