What you ARE, not what you AREN’T!

Posted on April 18, 2013 by tosabarbell

Duh.

I’ve received my share of private messages and e-mails from friends and family asking how to drop weight. I ask what they’re eating and inevitably, I’ll get the sales pitch that they actually eat pretty good. Sure there’s the occasional cupcake here and there but they certainly don’t eat this…

…or this…

…or absolutely not this!

Ok, first off, remember that time I asked what you ARE eating? I don’t care about what you say you aren’t (even though I know you’re lying.) After telling them to eat normal for a week and log their food, they come back with a list of about 800 calories a day full of veggies, fruit, and salad and a perplexed look on their face as to why they dropped weight this week even though this is how they always eat. When I remind them to eat NORMALLY, ya know, how you usually eat without lying to me their face floods with relief that they don’t have to starve themselves another week.

The second week looks a little more normal (but I know you guys still aren’t telling me about the sweets) and is the most telling. You ARE eating too many carbs (oatmeal, an english muffin, and a banana is a useless breakfast. Stop that.) Your “breakfast” smoothie full of fruit and spinach (yuck) doesn’t sustain you until 3pm? I’m stunned.

If you want to tell me what you AREN’T eating, start with enough protein. Duh. Calories/Carbs/Sugar are sneaky little f*ckers. Pay attention. If you find yourself getting (or staying) fluffier than you should be, track it. Pay attention to what’s going in, not the stuff you’re consciously passing on.

Here’s a little blurb on why women shouldn’t run. It’s a simple read and says women shouldn’t run so I’m all for it. Heh.

Texas will again lift it’s head and stand among the nations. It ought to do so, for no country upon the globe can compare with it in natural advantages.

Sam Houston

Training Log

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

But You Didn’t

Posted on April 16, 2013 by tosabarbell

I had some initial thoughts yesterday after hearing about the Boston bombings. First and foremost… not good. There are people who’s lives are permanently damaged and changed both emotionally and physically. Those are the folks who I assume are on the receiving end of the endless thoughts and prayers coming from the general public.

The next few thoughts came in quick succession. First, the media will now run the same two to three clips available reporting absolutely nothing. All you people who just spent 8 hours in front of CNN, you’ll never get those 8 hours back. And you learned nothing. Nothing. You’ll hear Wolf Blitzer speculate and make up stories as long as it keeps a viewer on his channel. What a piece of garbage.

After they become bored with themselves (as if), they’ll seek out spectators and those “on the scene” for eyewitness accounts. The two most common questions will be, “Where were you when the bombs exploded?” and “How are you feeling about it?” Morons. This will eventually trickle down to the local news stations where they have been scrambling trying to find a “connection” to the tragedy. Who’s there that we know, who can come on and tell us about running, who has ever been to Boston in the last 40 years?” Put ’em on the tube.

The predominant message we’ll hear (or those of you still watching will hear) is…“I was almost in that spot” or “I almost could have maybe been in that area and died!” But you didn’t, why are you on the news? Two stories stick out in my mind. One woman who sometimes shops at one of the stores that was at the center of one of the explosions was “Terrified” that she shops there regularly and “COULD” have been there at that time. But you weren’t? So why are you on TV? You’re ok, see? You weren’t there. Shut up.

Another story was of a runner who is attributing the fact that she’s still alive to two mid-run bathroom breaks. Cuz, “If not for those bathroom breaks, I’d be dead right now.” But you aren’t. You’re on the news giving an eyewitness account of absolutely nothing. You smelled smoke up ahead and didn’t know what it was, then had to stop running. Other than running for about four hours in the same city where this occurred, you have nothing to do with it. You didn’t die. See? Shut up.

Harsh. I know. But someone please tell me what it is about Americans that they need to “almost” be struck with tragedy? I get it, it’s scary and turns our extremely secure world upside down for a few days. But you’re ok. I’m ok. The blood on the sidewalk? It’s not yours. So shut up and be thankful. Get off the news and go hug your dog. If you don’t have a dog then I can understand why you’re such a spastic attention whore. Go get a dog.

The second to last thought is wondering how the government will use this to decrease our personal rights. Cuz it’s coming. Wait for it.

Lastly, to families who now have a long journey of grief; healing; and rebuilding…aloha.

Half a truth is often a great lie.

Benjamin Franklin

Training Log

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Enjoy the NooB

Posted on April 16, 2013 by tosabarbell

I’ve had many discussions with veteran strength coaches on the phenomena of the elite NooB. It’s my highest complaint of many of the CF folks. Bring someone in the gym; put a barbell in their hands for the first time; teach them idiotic form and habits; call them Elite. Boom! You’re awesome. Or not.

Many people come to different forms of exercise or sport with little to no experience of competition. They hear the fact that Tiger Woods was three (or whatever) the first time he held a golf club but fail to understand how those first 15 years of work carry over to his present day results. Or if you’re a Tiger hater, use Adam Scott. Or Serena’s first tennis racket. Or…well you get the picture.

Being a NooB is fun. You’re learning. You’re years away from knowing. I ran across a thread in the NASGA forum the other day on how long it takes to know what you’re doing at the Highland Games here. Kel Mulrey shares the answer he was given, “a track and field guy would take about 2 to 3 years everyone else 5yr’s and over.” Five years?! That’s too long, I want to be tops NOW. Heh. Not really.

This desire to be the best NOW is all over the place. I’ve read some powerlifter’s logs who are patting themselves on the back about a 20# meet PR on a lift when it’s their SECOND meet! Of COURSE you’ll hit big PR’s on your second meet, especially when they’re over a year apart! Let me read about your 20# PR’s in ten years and then we’ll be impressed. How long did Andy Bolton train for his 5 pound PR on his 1008# deadlift? A while. Duh.

Being a NooB means you have to learn; you have to listen; and you get to have fun with no pressure for excellence. Respect the people who have been in your sport for years, listen to them, appreciate them. Be patient and enjoy the ride.

I managed to beat Michael Phelps’ 400 meter IM time. And not only did I beat his time, but I did it in exactly 200 meters.

Jarod Kintz

Training Log

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Monday Bacon: Carry your weight

Posted on April 15, 2013 by tosabarbell

I’ve mentioned before that we live right across the street from an elementary school. Since spring is theoretically in the air, the screaming coming from the playground has amp’d up a notch.

Our street gets pretty clogged twice a day. So much so that me getting out of my driveway can get pretty perilous with narrow streets and cars parked along both sides. I’ve even had people park their cars in our driveway, “Only for a minute” until their kid gets out of school. That’s one mistake one red car driving blondie won’t make again.

The narrow mindedness of elementary parents boggle the mind. During the winter, as I’d don the boots and hat to get the sidewalk shoveled in time to make sure the little angels don’t start their school day on their asses, I’d have some parents (who refused to get off their cell phone for two minutes) literally stand impatiently as I’m shoveling with their best Valley Girl “Uhhh, Excusssse me” impression I’d seen in a while.

But the worst of it? This…

What is it about Wisconsin children that they can’t carry their own backpacks? Since when did that become popular? I can’t remember EVER carrying my kids’ back packs. We’ve even gone through just about every sport imaginable with large, equipment filled bags needed and I still did not even consider carrying them. I absolutely refused to carry hockey bags. Have you seen a goaltender hockey bag? It’s ginormous PLUS pads. But if she wanted to play goalie, she could carry her own stuff. Fact.

What is the lesson parents? You have enough on your plate just walking down a sidewalk, I don’t want to confuse you with carrying a backpack??????? SRSLY? Rain or Sun, Snow or Sleet, let kids know now that they’ll be responsible for their own stuff. And I really don’t want to hear, ‘but sometime’s they’re really heavy!’ So what? These kids are walking half a block. They’ll be ok.

On the flip side, there’s a little girl who walks at least five blocks from the south. She’s awesome. I’m guessing a fifth grader who seems rarely to zip her jacket, never wears a hat, and always walks to school with a determined look on her face. I like this girl, she’ll go places. She’s probably always carried her own backpack. Truth.

Perhaps we have been misguided into taking too much responsibility from our children, leaving them too little room for discovery.

Helen Hays

Training Log

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment